Tell you what, YOU try it and let us know. I’m not gonna be trying that anytime soon.
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Never heard of colon cleansing? You’re in for a treat. It can make you younger! Give you energy! Improve your health! You see, apparently, your colon becomes coated with gunk that it can’t get rid of through normal processes. When your insides are covered with this nasty layer, vitamins and nutrients can’t get through, and it throws your whole body out of whack. In fact, you have no chance in hell of being normal if you allow your colon to keep its impacted layer of unpoopable sediment. You’re doing a great disservice to your body and should be ashamed of yourself.
Fortunately, there is a solution, which can be yours for a low, low price from the online affiliate marketer of your choice. The solution is amazingly simple. You take these pills or drink a mixture for a few days to loosen that evil coating. At the end of the treatment, you… expel the rope-like contents of your colon—that coating that was keeing you from a fulfilled life. Your entire colon. You’ll almost literally poop your guts out. There it is in the toilet bowl to amaze and astound your friends.
But that’s only half the story
It’s not enough to take the treatment and fill your toilet bowl with what never should have seen the light of day. You are now obliged to (I’m not making this up) fish it out and take a picture of it! You have now entered the Twilight Zone, where Internet scams meet medical quackery and closet fetishism.
You will not only take a picture of it, but you’ll distribute that picture to the blogs, bulletin boards, and purveyors of MagicColon all over the Net. You’ll have discussions about it, compare it to others’, and will be judged by the quality of your deposit. “It looks short. What is it, one meter?”
“Nice form…you can actually see the polyps and diverticula. It’s a near perfect mold. How was the bouquet?”
“Oh, it smelled like shit!”
“I’ll bet. Good thing you caught it when you did.”
Seriously, folks, it’s unbeLIEVEable. Google “colon cleansing” and see for yourself.
But Joe, heart surgery is gross and that has health benefits!
True, but most people don’t distribute photos of their aortic plaque. Still, might there be some truth to the dirty colon claims? In a word, No. The pills you take and the stuff you drink leaves lots of undigestible fiber in your colon and your body naturally gets rid of it in a few days. It’s not cleansing something unhealthy that was already there.
He has created a cleansing product that produces what the product is claimed to cleanse. I’m tempted to call it a brilliant scam, but I’ll leave that decision up to the courts, in case (hopefully) he ever gets sued by those who decide to do so. He’s earned millions by marketing this false idea, and the spreading of false ideas should be punished.
Here’s how this possible scam works:
Sell people a product that creates a condition, then claim that the product is curing the condition, without any proof that the condition was there before taking the product. (Mucus only becomes “plaque” *after* using his product.)
For even more thorough discussion and documentation of the bogus claims, check this out.
On second thought, if you’ve tried it, don’t tell us. We don’t wanna know. And we really don’t want to see the pictures!